Life With Sulis

its been a very very long week. I have had a migraine i can't shake despite all the pain reliever and imitrix in the world. I am NOT dehydrated like I am usually when this happens so I can't figure out what is triggering this one. Have a new coworker who is driving me nuts. She called me at 11:45pm on Saturday night. I wanted to shoot her. I am really frustrated with this situation and am not sure where I want to go with it. All of this frustration has brought on a huge amount of stress in my life because i started to think about what I really want. Poor Digi and Babyd don't know what hit them. Babyd has to listen to me sort out all the crap in my head and Digi I know feels like I am blasting him left and right for not doing things "RIGHT". I mean I realize that he has had some crappy things done to him by the women he loved but shit new flash "SHE IS NOT ME" I have never and will never do those things to you. I have way more class then that. Tear down the damn wall its ok I am not going to fuck with your head. But I do need and want to be treated like the princess that I am. This doesn't require a whole lot on anyones part. I am far from high maintenance. I prefer to do things on my own. But I do occasionally want to be swept off my feet and taken away somewhere to just be sulis and not someones mommy or landlord.

Speaking of which, I can't wait till February. I get to meet up with 2 very cool people and hopefully see rei and Cowboy> Y'all have no idea how nice it is going to be just to be Sulis for a few days. To get to do adult things that dont involve being responsible for anyone else. I am hoping that I will come home refreshed and ready to function more smoothly again.

I miss my flylady so I am going back to it. The structure of it makes me feel safe and happy. I love routines and order. I am freaking out about the chaos that is my life right now and I need to take it back. People need to understand that I need time and attention to. I can't give if i have nothing to give left.


Hopefully i will have a more concise post tomorrow. I have a ton of crap in my head and posting it all now would just confuse some people and or make them feel bad which is not my intention. I just need to continue sorting them out.

posted by digitalsulis @ 9:26 PM