Life With Sulis

How do we go about our business everyday like nothing has happened once you realize that everything you believed in your life has changed? Now that I know in which direction I want to head my mind and body are pulsating with the anticipation. My brain wont shut up. Continuously sending me more and more information on this and that that needs to be done. Sleeping is chaotic and nightmarish because my head just wont shut up. Then I start doubting myself. Am i making the right decisions. Am I making the right decisions for the right reasons. What am i trying to prove? Who am i trying to prove it to? What makes me think I can accomplish now what I could not accomplish just days weeks months or years earlier.Sometimes I think what makes me so special that I think that I deserve to be happy at all. Better people then I are not happy.But then I start thinking damn I have been through so much shit I must have paid my dues by now. How much more should I be forced to endure before I make up for whatever wrong karma thinks i have done. HOw the hell am i supposed to heal my soul. Put back together my heart. Maybe someone out there has the answer maybe they can share it with me. MAYBE!!!!

posted by digitalsulis @ 8:45 PM